When do you actually grow up?

"grow up"At 19 you’re considered a young adult, at 24 you’re meant to be having the time of your life, in your 30s you’re supposedly meant to have a grasp on life but do you really think there comes a moment in anyones life when they suddenly think, “Yes now i’m an adult”.

This year I’ve moved away from home, I’ve chosen a house to rent next year as well as who to live with and i’m trying to work towards a job more related to the dream career. These are big steps but I’m not an adult and I don’t want to be but the only thing stopping me from thinking I am is that going home is great and I don’t have the amount of responsibilities tied to a full time job. However, doesn’t everyone who gets along with their relatives enjoy going home and visiting their family? So in that aspect i’m no different to my 33 year old sibling. Second, it’s true the responsibilities are less but i’m still going to be working 40 hours a week supporting myself through University which contrary to belief if you do want a decent grade is hard work and a lot of pressure. So does that mean I’m an adult? I bloody hope not.

So here’s another way of looking at it. No one actually grows up. Do you really think they’ll come a time in your life where you won’t ever learn, experience or gain something new from the world? We are not growing up, we are living. Sure our first 20 years are where we perhaps see most change but thats just because it’s all brilliantly new. After this time we are still experiencing new things, environments, careers and responsibilties like bringing up a family but just at a slower pace. Perhaps some would say becoming a parent is when you “grow up”, in one sense of course, you’re caring for another completely dependent individual but you learn as you go and then you go into new stages, being a grandparent for example, is that the final stage of “growing up”? On average no, we will have the chance to experience more in our older age in retirement without the restrainment of work.

My idea for this blog was to express that worrying about when, if you have or do you need to “grow up” is a complete waste of time. You aren’t “growing up”, you’re living.

Too much drama?

As an ex-drama student I miss performing, acting, singing, rehearsing and learning lines like crazy. However, this isn’t the kind of drama I’m going to be talking about.

Real life drama, the issues you have with people in your life that arise completely out of the blue that take you by complete surprise, that is the drama that is keeping me awake tonight.

The path life takes is so foggy that a brick wall can just appear straight in front of you without you realising at all but why do the walls construct themselves? Why can’t these obstacles just vanish as instantly as they arrive? The answer- everyone has some drama in their lives. Each obstacle supposedly teaches us something else but everything I’ve ever faced resulted in having only two options, break it down with a sledge hammer- cut ties with the person causing the issue, or climb over the top of it and moving forward. Well I’ve gotten to a point where climbing over the top is a lot more effort for some issues than bringing down the whole construction, just because you’ve climbed over it once doesn’t mean you wont have to tackle it again. Of course that means you subsequently lose some people in your lives but I’ve discovered so many people are superfluous in our lives and only a handful are worth climbing over and moving on with.

I understand this is quite a sad little note but it shouldn’t be, it’s the beginning of a life where you’ve cast out all the negative hindrances with only things left are to make you stronger and happier. That is what too much drama has taught me.. the more drama in your life the closer you are to reaching the end of the mix and match obstacle course.